I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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