The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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