Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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