I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
