My room smells like vodka and shame
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
