found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
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