Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Damn victory sex feels great
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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