lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Found your dick twin last night
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
