wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
