I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize