who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Randomize