I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Dick very happy bro
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
