I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
