OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
