He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
