She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize