Slut skills are useful in every country.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
