so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
