Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
