I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Randomize
