porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Randomize
