can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Randomize
