I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize