singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
