A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
North Korea, Best Korea!
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I wish there were birth control emojis
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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