I wish I could teleport
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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