Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
The ass gains better be worth it
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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