Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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