I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
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