If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
