I hate your face
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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