in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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