her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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