Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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