It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
