i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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