just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Randomize
