question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
