I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
