My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize