i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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