when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
