i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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