I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
