Non-Jews are for practice
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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