We're facebook friends in real life
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
