eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
