Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Randomize