I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Randomize
