Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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